Khushi
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« Reply #48 on: May 26, 2006, 11:55:01 PM » |
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Thumb wipe!
Banta was driving down the street looking for a place to stop so he could go to the bathroom. He stopped at a bar and went inside.
"Bartender! Where is the bathroom, I really need to go?!" he asked.
The bartender pointed him to the bathroom. So Banta went to the bathroom and looked over to the side. There was no toilet paper!
"Oh no!"
He looked over again and saw a sign that said: If out of toilet paper use your thumb and ask the bartender for a "thumb wipe". "Bartender!" he said.
"What can I do for you?" asked the bartender.
"Um.. there was no toilet paper and I need a thumb wipe.
"Oh," said the bartender. "Put your thumb on the bar."
"On the bar?"
The bartender replied, "Yes, on the bar."
So Banta put his thumb on the bar and the bartender pulled out a hammer and slammed it hard on the Banta's thumb.
Banta's instant reaction was to put his thumb in his mouth. Too Funny Too Funny Too Funny Too Funny Too Funny Too Funny Too Funny Too Funny
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with love
Khushi
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Khushi
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« Reply #49 on: May 26, 2006, 11:55:29 PM » |
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Santa goes for a movie. There is a scene in the movie where the actress starts removing her clothes before she gets into the river to bathe. However, just as she starts undressing, the scene is interrupted by a train passing by.
The next day, Santa goes back again, and again the next day, and again the next day.
Finally, the guard at the door is puzzled and asks Santa why he watches the movie everyday.
Santa looks at him and tells him ki "oye, dont u see? one of these days the train will be late and i'll get to watch the scene uninterrupted"!!
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with love
Khushi
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Khushi
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« Reply #50 on: May 26, 2006, 11:56:45 PM » |
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DEATHS THAT MADE EVEN TOP DOCTORS WONDER...
This case happened in a hospital's Intensive care ward where Patients
Always died in the same bed and on all Sunday morning at 11a.m,
regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even
thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve
the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM. So a world-wide
expert team was constituted and they decided to go down to the ward to
investigate the cause of the incidents. So on the next Sunday morning
few minutes before 11 a.m. all doctors and nurses nervously waited outside
the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about.
Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects
to ward off evil........ Just when the! clock struck 11...
and then......
then.....
then........
then........
then........
then........
Santa Singh, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and
unplugged the life support system & plugged in the vacuum cleaner. Too Funny Too Funny Too Funny Too Funny
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with love
Khushi
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Khushi
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« Reply #51 on: May 26, 2006, 11:57:10 PM » |
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Santa one day asks Banta that what should he present Preeto for their engagement function ?
Banta replied that he should give her a costly Diamond Ring.
Santa refused and said "no yaaaaar... i wanna give a big gift".
So Banta replied "Give her a MRF TYRE".
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with love
Khushi
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Khushi
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« Reply #52 on: May 27, 2006, 12:03:08 AM » |
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Basic training
Santa was in Telecom deptt. before joining the army. As part of his basic training, he went out on the rifle range. He fired 99 shots at the target, and missed the target with every shot! His Drill Instructor was very upset with him.
"What`s the matter with you?" asked the Drill Instructor. "Why can`t you hit the target? What were you in civilian life?"
"I was a telephone man," replied the Bantat, "and I don`t know why I can`t hit the target. Let me see..."
Banta checked his rifle, checked his rifle again, and checked his rifle a third time. He then put his finger in front of the muzzle, pulled the trigger, and blew the end of his finger off!
"Well," Banta said, writhing in pain, "the bullets are leaving here fine. The trouble must be on the other end!" Im with stupid
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Khushi
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Khushi
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« Reply #53 on: May 27, 2006, 12:03:47 AM » |
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Santa in Chandigarh
Santa was visiting Chandigarh for the first time. He wanted to see the Rock Garden.
Unfortunately, he couldn't find it, so he asked a police officer for directions, "Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Rock Garden?"
The officer replied, "Wait here at this bus stop for the number 46 bus. It'll take you right there."
He thanked the officer and the officer drove off. Three hours later the police officer returned to the same area and, sure enough, Santa is still waiting at the same bus stop.
The officer got out of his car and said, "Excuse me, but to get to the Rock Garden, I said to wait here for the number 46 bus. That was three hours ago. Why are you still waiting?"
Santa replied, "Don't worry, officer, it won't be long now. The 43rd bus just went by!" Shocked Shocked Shocked
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with love
Khushi
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